i miss J. who hasn't talked to me since before my trip home. he is busy with a contract ending and looking for a new one and a new girlfriend and his own real life, but i miss him so.

the sprinkler is running in the backyard, the tick, tick, tick, tatatatata is so nice and rhythmic. i have taken to covertly watering the lawn, because if i have to listen for one more day to N. talk about how he doesn't know what to do to nuture his brown lawn, i am going to scream and attack him like some stupid home video show on spike.tv.

the business has hit a lull, perhaps i have already awnsered the needs of everyone that needed one in the first week of my existence. that would be a total of two. ho-hum.

christmas worries are weighing me down. i can't imagine how we are going to be able to scrape up the cash to buy presents for the boys and each other and ALL the family that will be visiting. money sucks, or more accurately the lack of money sucks.